– but yet another opportunity has arisen that requires that i do so (until one day i actually inspire a bio-writer to write about me!) so here goes my first crack at it…..

………………………………………………………………………………….

Black Atticus is the co-founder & administrative director of Black Sunshine Arts-N-Entertainment, co-slam master of Knoxville Poetry Slam, as well as a proud member of The Loose Leaf Collective. His work is based in a way of word and literature that people find educational and entertaining, for it tends to be rhythmic and centered on a timing made popular to Hip Hop Culture’s word play, but is heavily influenced by collegiate and spiritual knowledge bases. A nationally ranked and recognized slam poet, Black Atticus is known for his clever approach to story telling and conveyance of inspirational messages.  He’s honored to be allowed the opportunity to share with us, and hopes his work enhances the experience.

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THERE.   it took me 45 minutes to write….( TONS of adding and deleting and scrapping the whole thing and retyping…) but do believe that i can live with that.

OK — I’m on my growth-boi (yes…BOI) I did something real simple last night. I rested.
I’m sure that’s something hardly to be felt by those who either don’t know me or dont’ know what it’s like to truly truly BE restless; insomniatically* so,  as if not sleeping holds some secret the day has been keeping from you til the 25th hour.

So I slept and naturally it felt great, and every time I do it i say to myself: “i should do that more often”, but of course i don’t….somewhere, I want to blame NAS cause he told me “I never sleep, cause sleep is the cousin of death”, and no matter how much that may be true, LIFE and NATURE is our mother and without proper rest/ recharge, we drain ourselves further into ‘Cousin Death’s’ clutches.

I’ve spent the last few days thinking about HOW i REALLY FEEL about my life and my philosophies on life and blah blah blah, and it’s come to me in spurts, WAYS to convey my voice  and thoughts more honestly; and like most things about HUMANS, it’s damn near impossible to convey everything we’re feeling, thinking, thought, felt, experienced, and learned in ONE BLOG or ONE SONG or ONE JOURNAL ENTRY. It would take months, years, who knows…”a lil baby lifetime”.

so yeah..spurts.

the two that come to mind right now:

1) “Only the Good Die Young” is an evil ass statement.

It implies that those who don’t die young are of the bad, or not as good as those who died young, which is some bullshit. I know plenty of good people who’ve lived nice long lives and they’ve shown me that we should be on some Spock Jenkin’s “Live Long and Prosper” kick, for there is SO much you can’t gain when your young; such as wisdom and the power it brings, knowledge and the power it brings….options…lessons beyond academic schools…hell…you get closer to understanding things you’re young spirit and mind can’t fathom until u get 40-60 years under your belt. Besides…Life’s a Gift…..death is just a part of it. I doubt I’d appreciate those who show me love and let me know how they really feel if I knew we’d all be here forever in this form on this planet and it’s problems. I dont think we’d even have words like “TIMELESS” when we think of it in regards to songs or writings or movies or people we love if we knew we’d all be here forever in this form on this planet and it’s problems. There’s something sacred in the balance of night and day, in up and down, between push and pull, between love and hate, between your ex’s who left and those that stay, between real and fake, between true friends and fair-weathers; and SO is the balance between life and death. it’s necessary to keep the experience complete and worthy. So Live n’ Take Yo Ass to Sleep when you’re sleepy so you can enjoy the next day dammit!

which leads me to my next spurt:

2) Sleep/Rest can be a form of worship…a sign of appreciation for this experience we call life, because you are reserving the energy necessary to fully experience and engage your days with everything you’ve got.

Genesis 2:2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made. After God completed all his works he rested. Today we are promised a rest.

Benjamin Franklin
He that can take rest is greater than he that can take cities.

Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

ZIMBO.COM QUOTE on ‘Entering Into Rest’

“Let’s define the word rest. To cease from action The word rest means to cease from labor or exertion. Applying that to God’s rest, it means no more self-effort–no more trying to please God by your fleshly works. Rest involves cessation from legalistic activity; we rest in free grace. We are now free to walk in the Spirit. To be free from worry Some people are never at peace because they’re always bothered about something. To rest means to be free from whatever disturbs you, or causes you to worry. It means in this sense to be quiet, still, peaceful, and free from guilt” –

Jean Paul
No rest is worth anything except the rest that is earned.

Ovid
What is without periods of rest will not endure.

Ernest Hemingway
I still need more healthy rest in order to work at my best. My health is the main capital I have and I want to administer it intelligently.

ok yeah..so …enough on that thought.  here’s a video i wanted share,

this brother’s hands LITERALLY make the ‘ninja wind sound’ when they’re moving all quick in the movies!!!  check it out he does it SOON as the video starts! amazing!

* love making up words!!!

I’ve decided today that i’m going to BE and aggressively so.
I’m releasing Home Studio Tour and organizing a ‘House Party Tour’ simultaneously.

As for my next album, I’m going to release Radio Active, while working on Medussa’s Braids.
Today Bush hit me up with another classic him and Miller Time composed. I wrote to it immediately.

best line i wrote last night:
“my opinion over drums…OVER drum,
it’s like i’m trynna squeeze the sun
through the barrell of a gun,
through the apparrell and the lungs
of the day we over come,”

i’m loving it.
also, i reconnected with the sound
of one of my favorite artist (..i’m well over
naming names at this point) and today i realized
they have a huge fixation with 90’s R&B drums.
the way the swell and ride is truly unique, and
they definitely take large advantage of the fact
hardly anyone today is even paying proper homage
to that cess pool of dopeness.

….hardly…..opperative word. >:-T

me time’s the shit.

i’m doing this more often these days.  the more i stop going out and blowing money in bars and wherever else i was spending loot, i’m finishing up a lot more work, especially song wise.  this is a lovely, lovely, lovely part of the growth process: sharing.

first off

there has to be little to no personal life.

if the goal is greatness, if the goal is complete fulfillment of destiny

there can be no sought after personal interaction that combines with desires,

initially.  HOPEFULLY those things will fulfill themselves along the way,

but often get in the way if selfishly pursued. 

secondly

there has to be rigorous self sacrifice.  generally in the form of a routine

mainly within the confines of the mind.  you control your mind, place it over matters,

let it dominate personal conflicts long enough to make right decisions (funny…i was just thinking about a right decision doesn’t necessarily feel like a GOOD decision or coincide with GOOD feelings all the time), then you should be way more successful in completing what needs to done.

third

don’t forget love.  the best way i can describe that is to remember a quote:

“love is something you do without expectation” 

it’s harder to pull off then it seems.  you usually and always want something..no matter how selfless it seems.

EXAMPLE: if you’re sick and someone calls you talking about: “i was just seeing you wanted some company or need to run some errands for you”  — it’s a call of love possibly…but it’s loaded with wants.  they want to feel like they helped or their just nosey and want to know how bad you’re really doing, etc.

another person calls and simply says “i just called to let you know i’m thinking about you” and hangs up.  still a selfish act.  it’s truly hard to just commit an act of love.  it’s easier to pull off with yourself, especially when you’re just doing the right thing.  NOT smoking when you want to. NOT spending when you want to. NOT doing what you want all the time. it sucks, it hurts, it’s not fun or desired. you’re just doing the right thing cause you know it’s right.  it doesn’t feel romantic…it’s love.  start there then work on others.

fourth

write out the purpose. look at it, and stop trying to log it all in that brain of yours.

you’re reading a blog, i really shouldn’t have to go into great detail of the importance of writing stuff down.

my group today (loose leaf) comprised the first playlist for our first album.  this has been a huge debate that we’ve discussed for over a year, whether or not to do a mixtape or an original album of our work.  well..today after a three month sebatical, we looked a list.  a list of all the songs we’ve done and those we have in the works.  from looking at this list we were able to SEE that we’ve done quite a bit of work that can be pulled together to form our first body of tangible music.  we’re calling it a mixtape but it’s completely original material so i guess we’re actually doing a ‘mixtape album’ go figure: i suggested we do that in first place — should’ve broke out the list months ago.

fifthly ..yeah…fifthly

rest.  rest. rest. rest. rest. work. work.work.work.work.

i am a box,

withing my confines are the unknown

vast as imagination

so within me, could be what’s within you

and without you, if that makes sense

which it should…for imagination

is as real as touch, feel

taste, smell, and whatever it is

sound does to your ears

it is hear

in this box that i am.

but don’t feel like frustration

or fill with motivation

i am bound by imagination

thust limitation is just a gang

of 10 letters comprised by wise fools

the box rules it’s space, this space

and takes no planet from it’s orbit

simply cause it’s tired of looking at it

from a scope

it copes, it denies, it speaks

truths turned lies, and back again

and the only thing not within this box

is time.

and there’s no time to explain that last line

so just accept it like your every effort to be accepted.

or protected

or elected

for i am the moon light

blocked by the box i live in.

my words.

you live in.

as i grow

sleepy.

words of an abandoned blog

floating in space like debris displaced from 

wrecked ship cased in

hyperdrive folded blind

folded, I’M

molded grime golden shine chosen I’M

frozen time open mind scared of rhyme,

her reason, my bleeding, their season,

the breeding of even thinking about leaving it all

is drawing away in stages

pass the margin’s call and the pages laws,

the gravity of certain reality’s

 impact and fall

can cause a fear of living life,

minimized and penalized for not being baptised

in Oscar’s eyes, not IMAX size,

sharing sound

connecting eyes and looking around,

i’m bound to forms of depression

they haven’t come up with a name for, yet

we still accept them like visa-master card-expressed

hard feelings undressed for this one night head stand

an inch from the edge of the cliff of a ledge at the tip of the said

sad song known as

‘they’re gone.’

i have an issue with wrapping my heart around women who are either over hundreds-n-hundreds of miles away or they’re locked into relationships with dead beats they can’t leave.  ironically, i find myself wanting them more than the women who are available and obviously want me. 

this is a state of insanity that must and will stop.

i doubt i’ll get to the point where i’m blogging so well, i can enter a contest.  designing and hyper linking my post into infamy just won’t be happening in the near future; however, anything’s possible.  so i’m marking it now, so…maybe i can eat my words later.  

i personally just don’t see how there’s really that much to say every single day, but then again I haven’t tried.  also, i haven’t really seen anyones blog truly pull it off.  if it is an every day blog deal, then it’s just someone doing a ‘knock off news article with their personal twist on the facts’  or their blogging for commercial reasons/financial gain (ie linking to merchandise or to a sponsor).  that’s not even what i’m into.

again…i may eat these words.

 also… fuck approval. (new poem to come i’m sure) seriously…  whoever or whatever group of individuals got you (me) stressing to-no-damn-end in order to get their/his/her approval; “fuck ‘em”. — let that desire die slow.  you (i) don’t need it. trust me.  Anyone short of God, is not worth it.   I guarantee;  neither of us will be eating those words later. 

MARK IT

“lyrics that scribe with a PURE RUSH..

keep the X-Box Live on the Tour Bus..

and the Respect Higher than a Floor UP…

cause I can’t fall behind like Your Butt…

EAT. IT.

flow to the heart’s beat, rhymes flyer than star fleet,

they nail gunned the name to the marquee,

busy like markey, H.R. “home running” like R.V.

while rapper’s ‘roast beefing’ like ‘weeellcome to Arby’s’…

I “heart” sharpies

bomb on the engine, buddy, please don’t start me,

you wanna keep living, just pass ‘em the car keys,

cause i’mma keep spittin’ at the ‘rhythm of warp-speed’..

some say ‘GNARLEY’ , like ‘Lo and the Mouse’ did you get that?

Hardly – spit dope quotes like dude from Marcy,

Plus I’m back from the future like my name was “Marty” (c) Black Atticus

Mark It.  Loose Leaf is that hotness.

*it’s still sinking in….i’ll have to write about it later though*